My friend read my mind today when she said it's always darkest before the dawn. She and I feel it strongly and I'm grateful to be able to share what I'm going through with someone who is going through a similar experience.
We've both been feeling like we've gone back in time to how we used to be at some point in our past. As though the healing and work we've done on ourselves was for nothing. It's upsetting and disheartening. My mind has been racing and it's been really difficult to focus for yoga and meditation. All sorts of random thoughts that seem to be desperately trying to get my attention, many of them old self-defeating fear-based programs.
But when my mind quieted down a bit today after I went for a swim, I felt it was the last stand of the 3D ego consciousness that senses it's impending demise.
My friend and I both used the same phrase today too. We both said, "I'm done with this pain."
